Being Seen

Audrey Hepburn in Roman Holiday 1953

One of the signposts of the recent cultural revolution is the oft-repeated phrase of not being seen. From the hard-working father supporting the family to the hardworking stay-at-home mother transforming a house into a home, a perceived lack of appreciation seems to be the norm.

My awkward teenage years were marked by confidence issues, especially regarding my appearance. Truth be told, I simply did not like myself at some level and, by projection, could not imagine why others would see me differently. Decades later, during school reunions, some female schoolmates, happily married, would suggest, after perhaps pointing out some of my positive qualities, that I came across as aloof and off-putting.

I raise this somewhat painful account to ask a simple question: just as every coin has two sides, is the perceived lack of appreciation a matter of its true lack, or is it, more simply, the inability to perceive it? In other words, might one be incapable of being seen and feeling bestowed love? We are again reminded of the need to look within and account for our actions and attitudes before we look to the outside and blame others for what might be missing in our lives.

Behold: more often than not, when we face the enemy, the enemy is us.

— Sina.