Twin Flames

Fifty percent of all marriages in America end up in divorce, and many others turn into marriages of convenience. One need not believe in metaphysical life after life to be curious about the idea of soulmates, or twin flames merging into one. Here’s one take after forty-six years into my own exciting and arduous relationship:

It all starts with chemistry. Good chemistry is defined less by physical attraction than by the ability to experience comfort with oneself in the presence of another. As the saying goes “We only fall in love with our mother twice,” like when a man feels as safe and comfortable in the company of a woman as he was with his mother and thereupon can be himself again. Obviously, the same goes for daughters and fathers.

Contrast the fairytale version of a soulmate – Prince Charming appearing on a white horse to take the princess away to live happily ever after – with the simple reality that life is hard and full of intermittent curveballs that help us grow. Children, financial challenges, health concerns, and natural aging all play a part in a typical decades-long relationship.

Fundamentally, soulmates are created, not randomly assigned. Like Jacob wrestling with the angel all night long until he was blessed, we must persevere in our relationship until our spirits merge.

As the great yogi Patanjali put it, “When we are inspired by someone or something, to the point we are willing to make a lifetime commitment, our thoughts break their bonds, our mind transcends limitations, our consciousness expands in every direction to expose us to a new, great and wonderful world. Dormant forces, faculties, and talents become alive, allowing us to be a greater person by far than we ever dreamed ourselves to be.”

The only way to open one’s heart is to have it break open by a loving partner, allowing light to shine in. Watch who you trust with your heart, but once entrusted, be ready to engage with your soulmate for eternity.

— Sina.